Instalment Three

We could never really tell why Faggot upset Gay so much. Faggot just seemed to persistently niggle at Gay by his very existence. Like those people you loathe instantly when you meet them but you can’t put your finger on why.

Faggot had developed the habit of referring to himself in the third person as well as adding a definite article to his name. He would saunter into a party and announce in that singsong voice of his, “The Faggot is here.” “Everyone turn around and look, The Faggot dancing!”

Gay hated it.

Out one night at a wine bar with his Best Friends Forever, Gay broke down in tears.

“But you used to hate us,” Fairy said.

“Remember when you met Queer, you hated him too. You said he was rude, insulting and just like ants at a picnic.”

“Look at you two now, happy as two children running naked in the woods. You boys are stronger, better people because of your friendship.”

“Don’t let The Faggot upset you?” Queer chimed in, “You should embrace The Faggot. He’s a good guy once you get to know him.”

“I’m not calling him The Faggot though,” Gay grumbled, “What about Fag?”